Ye godz....bleah.

[chaoswolf]

I feel terrible. I felt good all morning. Up until about 1505 when I woke up from my nap (on Nick's mathbook). Cell phone went off with a call from asahoshi. Talked to her for a few minutes, and she sounded depressed. When the conversation was comming to a close, she said "I love you" and I wasn't able to find anything to say in response. I swear, I don't know if the relationship as lovers will last much longer. I did send an email after she got offline. Wasn't very happy about the email because of the context mentioned. Abridged version is that the relationship isn't going to work out very well because we're in a long distance and devoid of all physical contact except for when we are at cons or each other's places. I don't see how it will work, but it doesn't mean we can't be friends.

It hurt to do that. It really did. I'm sorry.

Comments

[kitabare.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm starting to learn how hard it can be to be strong. I don't know if you were on the filter I used when I posted about my problems... I was expecting me to be the one to lose faith first, I wasn't.

I guess the main thing is to know if you love someone. If you really love them, then you have to let that love be the foundation of your strength. You have to remind yourself that you love them and how you feel when you're actually together. You have to use that love to get the goals done that get you closer to not having to be apart.... that's what I used on him, and it worked. Maybe you can use it for yourself.

[chaoswolf]

*sigh* I'm not sure how well that's worked. Last time we met, she had Jason in her presence almost constantly. I guess I didn't feel much while I was up there....