I should've known better.

[chaoswolf]

I shouldv'e known that:

• I have to clean my room.
• I should've kept my guitar stuff somewhere findable, as I found the insturment, but no book.
• When mdlbear says "I've got it under control" what he really means to say is "Last time I needed more help from you. Now you have a night class you need to go to."
• When he says "This will start a trend" what he doesn't know is that I've done this before due to problems on certain days and have gone to the subsequent class session.
• I probably should stay home tomorrow because of flower_cat. Though I somehow doubt mdlbear will permit this to happen.
• Above mentioned bear does not realize that I love Mom! He is of the opinion I will be doing more good at school than here helping out. Especially because it's the days leading up to a con!!!!
• And finally, I need to clean my room....

Reasons why I'm a bit annoyed right now....see above. And tempting though it is to curse and throw things at my father, I won't do it for I value my life. What little there is of it.

Comments

[johno.livejournal.com]

Overall translation for da bear: "Don't worry, I can do it all myself."

This is not a slight to you, but a commitment that he wants...no wrong term...*needs* to take care of the Cat himself.

You have 2 choices.

1) Ignore his shooing you out of the house and stick around to step-n-fetch for the Cat. Sharing the load with him.

2) Let him do it all himself, but be prepared to catch him when he eventually falls over.

As for the con coming up. Family comes first. Cons sometime after.

[chaoswolf]

Re: item 1: If I ignore him, he'll just yell at me more.

Re: 2) if he fucks up while I'm at school, it's his fucking problem. My opinion: he doesn't want my help tomorrow, so why should I give a damn about him falling on his nose if he messes up?

[kshandra]

Because, as you said yourself, you love your mother. And if he fucks up, she may suffer as a result. Yes, there's a limit to what you can accomplish to FIX this while you're at school, but there will still be opportunities for you to help when you get home.

(And if he does fuck up, you get to enjoy a little bit of schadenfreude as he reconciles it in his head. No, I will not give you permission to tell him "I told you so.")

[chaoswolf]

I do understand that family takes priority. I do not understand why the bear has to be so fucking anal retentive about me skipping a single guitar class so I may come home and help out with the chores and stuff that has the family priority!

[figmo.livejournal.com]

He's your father. They do that kind of thing.

Part of being a parent is putting your education ahead of things like taking care of your mother, which is something he committed to when he married her. You, OTOH, were merely born into the fray. Even though you love your mother and want to help, your first obligation is to take care of your future.

Your mother will heal from the surgery and be better than ever. If you miss school, however, you can't get that time back.

[mdlbear]

She'll say it with or without permission, but that's ok.

[kshandra]

Yeah, I know. And I won't claim to be so highly-evolved as to be able to avoid saying it myself when the situation calls for it. This does NOT, however, mean I consider it a constructive use of one's energy, and I wanted the 'wolf to know that.

*hugs* for all of you.

[mdlbear]

I'm having a little trouble figuring out exactly what you think is likely to happen if you're not here. If Colleen needs to go back to the hospital, it's not as if you could drive her in. And she gets around the house pretty well, considering.

Yeah, I could use a couple of hours at work, but if I don't get it it's not exactly "falling on my nose"; worst that could happen is that mr_kurt might have to forge my signature on some paperwork.

[kshandra]

As for the con coming up. Family comes first. Cons sometime after.

Hell fucking yes. Siladi said as much at the all-hands on Sunday. "This is a hobby - real life takes precedence."

[mdlbear]

You know, she has a long history of putting cons first in front of family convenience. Starting with her first one, 20 years ago in Sacramento.

[chaoswolf]

You know, I didn't intend for that to happen, alright? I just wanted to go to a con. Not my fault I got more publicity than the damned bid...

[mdlbear]

I believe your book is down here in the office. Frederick Nood, First Book for the Guitar? Been down here on a pile next to the wastebasket all week.

If you want to come home early and as you claim, have a way of making up the class, I may be able to use a little time at work. It's not essential, though.

I do realize that you love Mom. I'm worried about both of you.

[figmo.livejournal.com]

Um, folks...what part of "tomorrow is Wednesday" did you two forget?

It's not like there'll be nobody coming over who can help out, especially given that it's the Wednesday before a major local con.

If I can do sewing from your house, you might be able to bribe me into showing up sooner than I'd planned, thus solving everybody's problems.

[chaoswolf]

Considering that I don't have class tomorrow, it shouldn't be that bad.

[mdlbear]

Of course, we were talking about her Tuesday schedule. In the event it's a good thing she decided to ditch the class, since I was stuck in emergency from 1:30 to 11:30.

[chaoswolf]

Yeah, probably a good thing, since it gave Emmy someone to talk to and torture for that length of time...Kept her from burning the house down.

[silverstorm2013.livejournal.com]

Two comments in general,

1. Saying “I told you so” is a rare joy that balances the feeling of rejection when someone doesn’t listen to you when you’re right. Of course don’t take it to extremes, a simple 5 seconds of the “I Told you so” dance is more then enough, then you have to roll up your sleeves and help clean up the mess the person made not listening to you.

2. Con VS Family. I’ve always felt that Conventions were the family I get to choose to hang out with. If you’ve ever met my mother you’d understand why I say that. (my mother, I’ll tell you about my mother)

Now about this situation, Feeling of powerlessness SUCK, both you and mdlbear want flower_cat to get well ASAP. But really there is nothing you can do but wait for her body to heal and make sure she doesn’t do anything to re-injure herself. You both feel an element of helplessness, and want to do what you can. Give each other space, There will be times when You're going to have to carry the load because mdlbear won’t be able to get out of work, and other times you have to let him do the work because you need to take care of stuff you can’t put off.

There is plenty of work to do, don’t fight over the first day.

Storm